True Promise
” How long will you be poring over that newspaper? Will you come here right away and make your darling daughter eat her food ?”
I tossed the paper away and rushed to the scene. My only Daughter Sindu looked frightened. Tears were welling up in her Eyes. In front of her was a bowl filled […]
Married Or Single
A woman army driver, after a long drive arrived at her destination, a remote camp, at midnight.
The sergeant on duty showed her where to leave the vehicle, and then said, “Where will you sleep tonight?”
She said, “Well, the only thing I could do is to sleep in the cab.”
The sergeant thought for a moment and […]
Couldnt Open Jar
There is this really old guy.. like 60 years old. He comes into a hospital and says… “I wanna donate some sperm.”
So the nurse gives him a jar and tells him to come back tomorrow with the sperm.
The next day, he came back but the jar was empty… So the nurse says…..”What happened? Where’s the […]
Famous Last Words
I’ll get a world record for this.
Let me reach in and get your watch out of the printing press.
It’s fireproof.
He’s probably just hibernating.
I’m making a citizen’s arrest.
So, you’re a cannibal.
It’s probably just a rash.
Yeah, I made the deciding vote on the jury, so what of it?
The odds of that happening have to be a million-to-one!
Pull […]
Was It With The Same Cow
A man takes his wife to the State Fair, one of the exhibits is that of breeding bulls.
They come up to the first pen and there is a sign that says ”This bull mated 50 times last year.”
The wife pokes her husband in the ribs and says, ”He mated 50 times last year.”
They walked a little farther and see […]
Pigs Think Through
Scientists say that pigs, unlike all other domestic animals, arrive at solutions by thinking them through. Pigs can be – and have been – taught to accomplish almost any feat a dog can master, and usually in a shorter period of time.
Monkey Immune System
Scientific researchers say promiscuous species of monkeys appear to have stronger immune systems than less sexually active ones.
What use is an extra year or two
If each of us can be helped by science to live a hundred years, what will it profit us if our hates and fears, our loneliness and our remorse will not permit us to enjoy them?
What use is an extra year or two to the man who “kills” what time he has?
One Minute Ago
It is difficult to live in the present,
ridiculous to live in the future,
and impossible to live in the past.
Nothing is as far away as one minute ago.
Were we shot down?
A pilot landed a plane with a rather bumpy landing. As part of his job he was required to stand by the terminal door and say goodbye to the passengers as they exited the airplane. He was afraid that someone might say something about his rather less than perfect landing, but everyone left without saying […]