Hypnotist Par Excellence
A Woman comes home and tells her husband, “Remember those headaches I’ve been having all these years? Well, they’re gone.”
“No more headaches?” the husband asks, “What happened?”
His wife replies, “Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror,stare at myself and repeat
I do not have a headache;
I do […]
Five Cannibals
Five cannibals (Man eaters) get appointed as programmers in an IT company. During the welcoming ceremony the boss says: “You’re all part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So don’t trouble the other employees”.
The cannibals promise not to trouble […]
What To Do
Sam : I hate to see a girl standing in a bus when I am comfortable seated.
Lily : So what do you do?
Sam : I close my eyes.
Modes Of Payment
Woman : How can I ever repay you for your kindness and consideration to me?
Man : By cheque, money order or cash.
Difference Of Senses
Wife : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other
Husband : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.
End Of The World
BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there?
How Soon?
BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon?
Dance Like….
GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever..
BOY : Don’t you ever want to improve?
Apples
1st MAN : I’m worried about my daughter. She keeps being chased by the doctor.
2nd MAN : Has she tried an apple?
Happiest Hour Of Life
CAROL : Do you remember when you proposed to me? I was so overwhelmed, I couldn’t speak for an hour..
PETER : Yes Darling, that was the happiest hour of my life…