A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she presented her ticket to Houston. And as she gave the agent her luggage, she made this remark, “I’d like you to send my green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase to London.”
The confused agent said, “I’m sorry, we can’t to that.”
“Really??? I am so relieved to hear you say that because,… That’s exactly what you did to my luggage last year!”
Santa made a call to Airport and asked, “How long is the journey from Punjab to America?”
Receptionist, “One second sir….”
Santa, “Thank you!”
Shared By : Inderpreet Jassal
A male pilot is a confused soul
who talks about women when he is flying,
and
about flying when he is with a woman.
A pilot landed a plane with a rather bumpy landing. As part of his job he was required to stand by the terminal door and say goodbye to the passengers as they exited the airplane.
He was afraid that someone might say something about his rather less than perfect landing, but everyone left without saying a word except for one passenger, an elderly lady.
She slowly approached the pilot after most passengers had exited the plane and asked, “Did we land? Or were we shot down?”
“Flight 1234, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees..”
“But Center, we are at 35,000 feet, how much noise can we make up here?”
“Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 707 makes when it hits a 727?”
A young guy in a two-engine fighter was flying escort for a B-52 and generally being a nuisance, acting like a hotdog, flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber.
The hotdog said over the air, “Anything you can do, I can do better.”
The veteran bomber pilot answered, “Try this hot-shot.”
The B-52 continued its flight, straight and level.
Perplexed, the hotdog asked, “So? What did you do?”
What’s the purpose of the propeller?
To keep the pilot cool.
If you don’t think so,
just stop it and watch him sweat !
A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a landing at an airport they had never been to before.
The pilot looked out the windshield, and suddenly exclaimed to the co-pilot: “Holy cow! Look how short the runway is! I’ve never seen one that short!”
The co-pilot looked out the windshield. “Wow! you’re right! That’s incredible! Are you sure we can make it?”
Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off.
A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, “What was the problem?”
“The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine,” explained the flight attendant, “and it took us a while to find a new pilot.”
An airplane was flying from LA to New York.
About an hour into the flight, the pilot announced, “We have lost an engine, but don’t worry, there are three left. However, instead of 5 hours it will take 7 hours to get to New York.”
A little later, the pilot announced, “A second engine failed, but we still have two left. However, it will take 10 hours to get to New York.”