We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

A Miser to his kids at dinner time : Who doesnt eat the dinner tonight gets 5 bucks.

All the kids take 5 bucks each and go to bed.

At breakfast time : You gives 5 bucks gets the breakfast.

Whats the height of hope???

A 99 year old lady going for Cingular’s New Lifetime Scheme!!

What is the height of mixed emotions???

When ur mother in law falls from 7th floor on ur mercedes!!!!

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?

Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.

Dear God,

Thank you for all the blessings you have bestowed upon me. This time I will not ask anything for myself, please just give my parents a hot daughter-in-law!!

Your Always

 

From HS

SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?

FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?

SILVIA: Your name on this report card.

MOTHER: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?

JUNIOR: Because of absence.

MOTHER: You mean you were absent on the day of the test?

JUNIOR: No, but the kid who sits next to me was.

A family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Ba) arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters.

The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid; they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:

Dear Chandrakantbhai, Arvindbhai, Smitaben and Varsha,

I am sending Ba’s body to you, since it was her wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral home in GUJARAT.

This Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look on his face.

“Say, mom, why is my bigger brother named Mighty Storm?”

She told him, “Because he was conceived during a mighty storm.”

Then he asked, “Why is my sister named Cornflower?”

She replied, “Well, your father and I were in a cornfield when we made her.”

“And why is my other sister called Moonchild?”