1.       Refers to those “intimate moments” as “Win-Win situations”

2.       Valentine`s Day card has bullet points

3.       Can`t be trusted with the car (too accustomed to beating up rentals)

4.       Celebrate anniversary by conducting a performance review

5.       Ends any argument by saying “let`s talk about this offline”

6.       Tries to call room service from the bedroom

The classified ad said, “Wanted: CEO needs a one armed consultant, with a social sciences degree and five years of experience.”

The man who won the job asked, “I understand most of the qualifications you required, but why one armed?”

The CEO answered, “I have had many consultants, and I am tired of hearing with each advice the phrase – on the other hand.”