Five cannibals (Man eaters) get appointed as programmers in an IT company. During the welcoming ceremony the boss says: “You’re all part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So don’t trouble the other employees”.
The cannibals promise not to trouble [...]

Real Definition of BOSS:
“Boss is a person who thinks that nine women together can produce a child in one month….!!!!
 
Shared By : Gaurav Dhadwal

Now, we all are on the verge of becoming managers in your fields….
 
Take some good managerial skills to make it work…..
 
Programmer to Team Leader:
“We can’t do this proposed project. **CAN NOT**. It will involve a major design change and no one in our team knows the design of this legacy system. And above that, [...]

A new manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing.
On the last day the departing manager tells him, “I have left three numbered envelopes in the desk drawer. Open an envelope if you encounter a crisis you can’t solve.”
Three months down the track there is a major drama, everything [...]

On walking into the factory, the MD noticed a young guy leaning against the wall, doing nothing. He approached the young man and calmly said to him, “How much do you earn?”
The young man was quite amazed that he was asked such a personal question, he replied, none the less, “I earn 5000  a month, [...]

NEW RULES FOR EMPLOYEES
SICK DAYS:
We will no longer accept a doctor statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
SURGERY:
Operations are now banned. As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything. We [...]

A man wanted to buy his son a parrot as a birthday present.
The next day he went to the pet shop and saw three identical parrots in acage.
He asked the clerk, “how much for the parrot on the right?
The owner said it was $250.
“$250″, the man said. “Well what does he do?
“He knows how to [...]

It’s a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a fox, out for a walk.
 
Fox: “What are you working on?”
Rabbit: “My thesis.”
Fox: “Hmm… What is it about?”
Rabbit: “Oh, I’m writing about how rabbits eat foxes.”
 
Fox: “That’s ridiculous ! Any fool knows that [...]

It’s a fine sunny day in the forest and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk.
 
Fox: “Do you know the time, because my watch is broken”
 
Lion: “Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you”
 
Fox: “Hmm… But it’s a very complicated mechanism, [...]

With a pile of 300 résumés on his desk and a need to pick someone quickly, my boss told me to make calls on the bottom 50 and toss the rest. 
“Throw away 250 résumés?” I asked, shocked.
“What if the best candidates are in there?”
“You have a point,” he said. “But then again, I don’t need [...]